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On the record: Mixed reactions to Tuesday's outage

pascalpinck — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 08:22:15 +0000

The AP's Joelle Tessler and Jordan Robertson filed a follow-up story Friday that includes a variety of quotes on the significance of Tuesday's glitch at the FAA's flight plan filing center in Georgia. A few excerpts:

"If this (FAA outage) happened at a power plant, I'd be telling them to open up their checkbook and expect to be fined," said Jason Larsen, who spent five years at the Idaho National Laboratory examining electrical plants' control systems before he became a security researcher for IOActive Inc.

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Doug Church, a spokesman for the National Air Traffic Controllers Association -- a union that has been locked in a contract dispute with the FAA since 2006 -- argues that the agency has tried to focus on future technology to deflect its lack of diligence in maintaining its current systems. Church pointed to the agency's lack of a "safety net of redundancy" and its "fix-on-fail" policy, which means waiting for something to break before addressing a problem.

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"It's common. You see it in retail too. It's the whole 'don't fix it if it ain't broke' thing," said Branden Williams, director of a unit of VeriSign Inc., which assesses the security of retailers' payment systems. "It's unfortunate because it's very reactive, and it typically winds up costing you more."

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Sid McGuirk, associate professor and coordinator of the air traffic management program at Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University in Daytona Beach, Fla., believes that given the federal budget realities, the FAA has maintained a good balance. It keeps the system running efficiently without compromising safety, said McGuirk, a former air traffic controller and FAA manager. "From time to time, we are going to have a glitch, but it's a tradeoff," he said.

poetry, voices

oregonnerd — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 08:19:21 +0000

song

sketches of suspended dawnlight: weathered

almondtrees, still half-bloomed (ground

strewn with tattered pastel tissues): groundsquirrel

frozen, regarding

me intently: birds balleting (and cats studying):

this is the song

that silence teaches.

---------------------------------------------

Glenn

[1979, spring]

LEARN MORE ABOUT GLOBAL WARMING AND CLIMATE REFUGEES

werievents — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 20:30:08 +0000

6 Degrees Warmer: Mass Extinction?

If the world warms by six degrees, oceans will turn into marine wastelands and natural disasters become common events.

Six Degrees Could Change the World :
SUN FEBRUARY 10 8P et/9P pt :

5 Degrees Warmer: Civilization Collapses

If the world warms by five degrees the planet reaches a nightmare vision of life on Earth as traditional social systems break down.

4 Degrees Warmer: Great Cities Wash Away

If the world warms by four degrees oceans will rise and glaciers will disappear, cutting off fresh water to billions.

Six Degrees Could Change the World :
SUN FEBRUARY 10 8P et/9P pt : http://channel.nationalgeographic.com...

3 Degrees Warmer: Heat Wave Fatalities

If the world warms by three degrees the Mediterranean and parts of Europe will wither in the summer's heat.

2 Degrees Warmer: Marine Life At Risk!

If the world warms by two degrees, some of the changes to the biosphere are no longer gradual.What would Happen if The world was only 2 degrees warmer?
SAVE THE WORLD

Could Just One Degree Change the World?

Witness how drastically our world could change if the earth warms by just one degree.

poetry from voices

oregonnerd — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 09:11:57 +0000

memnon

this wilted rose

recalls you; its petals crumble at the slightest

touch.

----------------------------------

Glenn

Public transportation

jemfy — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 02:04:17 +0000

I am riding on the bus. I have nearly finished my book when the bus stops and more people board. One of them is a man with curly brown hair. He is wearing glasses.

As the bus pulls out into the road, the man starts speaking to his friends.

I am suddenly tense.

His voice does not belong to that body.

It is not too deep, or too squeaky or too nasal or anything. It just does not belong to him. Every time he speaks, I want to say: Someone stole your voice and replaced it with this one. Who are you?

I pull my book out of my bag again and pretend to read, but all is not right. I recognize people by their voices first, before faces or anything. This voice I hear does not belong to him.

I can't look up. I want the bus to stop.

At long last, we pull to the stop and everyone rushes off of the bus. I risk a peek at the man.

His face shifts, looking completely unlike his boarding-the-bus self from earlier.

His face matches his voice.

I feel as if I have been pulled away from the brink. So relieved. All is well again, the voice belongs to the man.

And then I think, what the hell just happened?

burnt sienna

soulscaping vamp — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 17:39:40 +0000

Shades of dirty crimson
Reflecting black hues of emotion
Splintered souls, refracting glimpses
Tumbled stains of insanity
Whispering fallen voices ..

A kaleidoscope of changes
Interrupting seasons of fierce passions
Regrets not quite forgotten
Buried fragments of disillusion

A million moments
Captured in split seconds
Pursuing lofty sentiments
Never quite abandoned

Dwindling fragments, stranded and trapped
Forever elusive hopes
A lifetime of slipping dreams
Nowhere to go
Slow burning soul ...

Favorite Voices

Kara — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 16:47:37 +0000

I was initially planning on posting an entry like this on last.fm, but I'd rather do it here now, instead. Although I'll listen to bands or artists with generally any type of singing voice, there are several who sing amazingly. Their voices either sound amazing, have nice tone/pitch/etc., or just sound unique. Or, if none of those apply, I just really enjoy the singing anyhow. Here's my list.

Ayaka
Probably the best voice I've ever heard, period. She always sounds so amazing, especially live. I really can't describe how she sounds, though.

Mika Nakashima
I've always thought her voice perfectly suited her music. It's somewhat deeper, but still sweet and beautiful.

Chihiro Onitsuka
Man, what a natural echo. Her voice is probably one of the most unique, because I truly haven't heard anyone sound like her. Although her "newer" voice (it changed somewhat because I believe she had throat surgery) isn't as enchanting, it's still lovely nonetheless.

Hyde
The only male on this list, probably because a LOT of male Japanese singers sound alike. Hyde's different, though. Not only his voice heavenly (no lie), he has a surprisingly large vocal range. At least, I think so. I could be wrong about the statistics on everyone!

Angela Aki
Some would probably say her voice is ordinary, but it's not! It's extremely clear and pronounced, and I think she sings with a lot of control.

Rurutia
I'm somewhat new to her music, but I love what I've heard. Her voice is so mysterious. It's really breathy, like a sweet whisper. I can't describe it.

Shiina Ringo
Now, I know a lot of people find her voice really annoying and, at times, even screechy. I love her actual style of singing, though. It fits her music so well

That's pretty much it! Sorry that this list wasn't really detailed. I should've added pictures too! Anyway, I've heard a lot about other singers with great voices, usually including Kokia, Misia, Stephanie, Alan, and a few more I can't remember. I still have to check them all out, and will do so.

More Poetry from "voices"

oregonnerd — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 07:26:45 +0000

anagram:

meanings 3

you promise me

meanings. i cannot stand

the ones i know,

i have.

---------------------------------------------

Glenn

Days of Elijah by Twila Paris (Music Video) Wednesday, September 3, 2008

peacefulone — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 14:06:32 +0000

ARTICLE OF INTEREST: THE LORD IS WATCHING OVER ME

Health, exercise, life: In the moment

Mish — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 02:57:41 +0000

This has been an intense week for me. I have left work, for a business trip, at a not so great time as I have a pretty big event that I have coming up in two weeks. I am trying to organise and mobilise students without making them feel like I am doing all of the work. I am doing it without tons of support from others...a lot of it is in my head..which is really my fault.

I had to say good-bye..temporarily to someone who I care about.

I am rebounding (lost weight) to some pretty crappy weeks.

But the thing which I have learned, deeply, is that I have to live in the moment. I was staying at girls house who is struggling with the '20 year old, OMG what am I going to do with my life' issues (they never subside, we just learn how to deal with them more). Anyways, 'The Power of NOW' was on her bookshelf with a marker about 20 pages in...looks like she didn't get too far in it. I started reading it, because I realise that I am a bloody s case. Here's what runs through my head all the time

I didn't eat how I should have, tomorrow
I wont be able to finish the race (that I am running Sunday week)
What if he breaks up with me?
What if I am not pretty/skinny/smart/sophisticated enough?
Should I be living so far from my family?
Just one more bite wont kill me...will it?
Am I doing everything that I can for the big project?
What if my big project fails?
Am I pleasing him?
BE IN THE MOMENT DAMN IT!

See...I am one of the crazies that can't silence the voices inside of my head..pretty much like everyone else in the world. Here's some interesting things that I think could be of help to people who are dieting, evaluating their life, etc. These are excerpts from 'The Power of NOW: A guide to spiritual enlightment' By: Eckhart Tolle 2005

Not being able to stop thinking is a dreadful affliction, but we don't realize this because almost everybody is suffering from it, so it is considered normal.

The good news is that you can free yourself from your mind. [...] Start listening to the voice inside of your head as often as you can. Pay particular attention to any repetitive thought patterns, those old gramophone records that have been playing in your head perhaps for many years.

When you listen to that voice, listen to it impartially. That is to say, do not judge. Do not judge or condemn what you hear, for doing so would mean that the same voice has come in again through the back door.

As I was plowing through this book on the train I had to hold myself back from 1. crying 2. not getting distracted by the thoughts which have consumed me throughout my life and have spawned up recently due to different changes in my life..all of which are great but have tapped into my thinking patterns.

Your mind is an instrument, a tool. It is there to be used for a specific task, and when that task is completed, you lat it down. As it is, I would say about 80 to 90 percent of most people's thinking is not only repetitive and useless, but because of its dysfunctional and often negative nature, much of it is also harmful.

If I read the above bullets of the 'thoughts' which run through my mind I can not link on to anything positive. Nothing that runs through my mind is positive. It isn't

The big event will be great
Even if there aren't things that work people are going to enjoy it
I am enjoying the relationship that I have right now
I am happy with the way that I look
I really enjoyed that chocolate piece of cake
The race is going to be a huge success, because I am going to be doing something for myself regardless
Wow, I am enjoying life right now

None of those above things are running through my head...never!

In order to find the peace, where you are in a state of being, which he defines in the book, where you are an observer of your thoughts and get to a place where you don't put energy into the negative thoughts you can start by

taking any routine activity that normally is only a means to an end and giving it your fullest attention, so that it becomes an end itself.

For me that basically means my whole damn day.

Waking up, being present in that moment of getting my body ready
Being deliberate about my time with people
Being deliberate about getting work done
EATING
- Actually TASTING MY FOOD
- LISTENING TO MY BODY
- - I am sitting here at the airport after eating a subway salad..good on me for not getting the nasty bread (but really it's Subway so again low standard) and I am not all that hungry. I know that I am going to get 'fed' on the plane..but I need to listen to my body. The thing is that I would normally eat the food because I would think, OMG if I don't eat I might starve...yes of course that's likely. It's changing how I think about everything.

I am not perfect. I never will be. But as I continue to read through this book, I'll keep updating you. The power of living in the moment will impact all of our journeys in everything..its impossible to deny. It honestly scares me to let go of the thinking...it's almost like a drug, a companion. I don't want to have to be with me solely...but I have to to be with someone else, to achieve my goals and use my limited time.

On Closings (the last poem in "voices")

oregonnerd — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 21:40:07 +0000

shades

i keep my shades drawn, these days,

though i'm not sure

i can say why (at times

i stand behind then, shyly and slyly

drawing them back just

enough to see)...

perhaps it's much like the girl

who wanted my friendship

or perhaps even more; i

was lonely and needed touching, and yet

i drew away...wounding

her so that she turned from me,

never suspecting i desired

all she might give...

i walk past people, holding

my face still, my eyes averted,

my feelings

quite hidden...

and when finally

i force myself to speak

(voice rusty from disuse)

i rarely find hearers; but then,

i can convince myself

i don't care, at all.

as, lonely, i hide

behind drawn shades,

closed doors.

-------------------------------------------

--Glenn

[probably dates from about 1976]

Taking the False out of Falsetto

Hitchcock — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 16:46:52 +0000

How, pray tell, did falsetto become cool again?

Male vocalists have employed the vocal technique over the past hundred years in lots of interesting ways. Think of barbershop quartets, doo-wap, surf music, soul, and glam rock. And who can forget the Bee Gees’ relentless whinnying over interminable disco beats? More recently bands like The White Stripes and MGMT have cranked up the volume knob on their garage-band amps, and cranked up the irony in their vocal register to match. Some of these altitudinous notes sound like they are coming from well-trained lungs, others as if from a Monty Python sketch. But it misses the point to scrutinize too carefully the quality of the voice. Falsetto toys with social meanings in a way that the normal register doesn’t.

A first point to make here is that falsetto crosses over gender expectations. A man otherwise deemed “manly” can cross over from his normal, deep vocal range to something reserved for women. It comes as no surprise that bands like 80’s bands Stryper and Poison used to wear tight clothes and make-up in conjunction with their high-pitched singing and screaming. They garnered attention by transcending the bounds of normalcy and civilized behavior. Philip Auslander points out in Performing Glam Rock (Ann Arbor: U of Michigan Press, 2006) that falsetto suggests a kind of liberation from social constraints by exhibiting the power of both sexes. Hence he dares to call Brian Ferry from Roxy Music “a male version of the Sapphonic voice” (p.167), meaning one, who like the lesbian poet Sappho, had become supra-sexed and who thus achieved something like angelic powers.

In a similar vein, Auslander points out that falsetto intimates a kind of sexual deviancy, manifested especially from the 1970s on. I find this interesting, because it means that male vocalists appropriated a feminine mode within a masculine expectation, namely, they made “singing like a girl” into an expression of sexual aggressiveness proper to a man. Think about the MTV videos from the late 80s/early 90s depicting feminine-looking men luring (clean, dolled up) groupies into their back rooms for sexual escapades. These men had become “dangerous” by their ability to traverse the gender divide and so could lead women into unknown realms of pleasure and power.

Maybe the most important thing to observe is that falsetto unites authenticity with play. That is, for all its pomp it comes across as “spontaneous,” the broadly accepted criterion of good rock music. Because it violates civic norms (especially when combined with other gender bending performance techniques), falsetto suggests that a vocalist doesn’t give a damn about the world, and therefore must simply have integrity, i.e., be at home with himself. But singing glass-shattering notes obviously exudes a real playfulness. As showboating, it would seem to be entirely the voice of an imposter were it not for the fact that it also has self-consciousness built into it. No one actually thinks that this is the lead vocalist’s actual voice. He very obviously employs it because he can, not because he is limited to it. (This is the heart of all “popular” gender bending, is it not?) He is utterly authentic because he knows how to play the game so well. And so, mutatis mutandis, there is nothing false in falsetto.

Ugh?!?

Greg — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 06:25:46 +0000

Well, here it is, I finally started a blog. I have been encouraged to do this for over two years. My argument against it was always: "But I have nothing to say." I read books about it, lurked, talked to bloggers, lurked, talked myself into it, lurked, talked myself out of it, lurked, swore off blogs, lurked, talked about it, lurked, read more blogs, lurked, talked to more bloggers over beer, lurked.

Then it happened, both my daughters started blogs!

That's it, if they can do it, I can do it! I ran down the hall, grabbed my laptop and signed up for a blog all the while beating down the naysayers in my head.

They are a pesky lot, and persistent. I know they lie, that's all they do. (I think it is their nature.) I used to think they told the truth. Then one by one people who really love me started telling me the voices lied. I wasn't sure I really believed them. What the voices said felt true. I know now they lie. But damn those pesky voices, they still trip me up.

Come as one

juliettelucie — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 21:44:37 +0000

Love ALL Parts of Yourself

jeremykalan — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 20:39:03 +0000

We tend to scour the world looking for love…through new experiences, other people, our pets. Where we first need to find love is in ourselves. We can be our own harshest critic. We don’t let ourselves get away with anything…”that was a dumb thing to say” or “I’m such an idiot” is often part of our internal dialogue. These voices of our Inner Critic really get in the way of loving our self. So you might think that we need to get rid of this Inner Critic and push it away. It seems that what we resist, persists and that doesn’t work well. We are actually being unloving towards a part of our self. We are disowning a part of self, the Inner Critic, and it doesn’t like that and starts yelling even louder.
So one way that I have found very helpful in learning to love myself more is to embrace ALL parts of me….and there are a whole bunch of parts. This is all based off of Roger Strachan’s work called Parts Work. For me, there is my Worrier, Perfectionist, 5 year old boy, Lover, and Warrior of Freedom just to name a few. There is also the True Self, which is comprised of all the different parts. So each part is a part of the True Self. Each has its own personality and way of seeing the world. Your face and body actually change depending on which part you are identified with in that moment. When you are identified with a certain part, that part actually believes it is the True Self and the only thing that matters and you are run by it. The goal is to notice which part is present and know that you are so much more than that part. You are the True Self, the voice of truth and reason, the wise elder, the part that hears all the others. Through dialoguing with my parts (yes I talk to myself) I have discovered that each one wants to be heard, to be understood, and to be loved.
So imagine that the True Self is the president and all the other parts are your cabinet members. It is the True Self’s job to listen to all the parts and honor them as unique and sacred. They all have an important message for you and they want to convey that. Each part is trying to communicate what is true for them. So each part has a truth but it is only part of the truth. As the True Self you listen to the parts with love and compassion and wisdom. Then the True Self as President gets to decide what he/she wants to do.
I want to add that the Worrier actually plays an integral part in my survival. If I never worried I would fall right off a cliff. So the Worrier needs to be listened to AND as True Self you get to decide consciously what you agree with and what you don’t.
Example: My Worrier is trying to tell me something…I may know this by feeling anxiety in my body. When I feel that anxiety, I am identified with the Worrier and not being the True Self. My mind may be racing saying, “you’re gonna fail, its not gonna work out, don’t even try.” First step is to be aware that the Worrier is present. Then you want to objectify the Worrier by acknowledging its presence, “I hear you and I love you and what are you trying to communicate to me Worrier?” “This might not work and we don’t want to fail so lets not try.” “Ok, thank you for your opinion, I am aware of that possibility and I have decided to go for it anyway.”
The key here is objectifying the part. When you do that, instead of being the Worrier, you zoom out to being the Witness (True Self) of the Worrier. You draw power away from the Worrier, which helps to relieve the anxiety, and you get to stand in your power as the True Self.
This powerful way of being with yourself is work that we can do together in a much deeper and more all-encompassing way. If you have any questions feel free to ask me. Be a unified self and love ALL parts of you. It feels so much better to love my Worrier then to hate him because it doesn’t feel good to hate part of myself.
Thank you Writer part for expressing all of me in such an eloquent way!

-True Nature Coach

Found on YouTube - Made my day

Hazel Homewood — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 12:15:24 +0000

Barbra Streisand sings Run Wild

Thursday, August 21, 2008

dailymix — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 11:34:08 +0000

A perfect street fight: video

An eclipse from the other side: picture

The business of being Michael Phelps' mom: article

The faces behind the voices: pictures

A little bit of everything...: The Faces Behind The Voices

chrispwalsh — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 18:24:03 +0000

Meet the talented voice actors behind some of your favorite TV and movie characters. In most cases, these are only some of the many voice roles they've done.

A little bit of everything...: The Faces Behind The Voices.

Night time

chrispydivine — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 04:04:52 +0000

The world seems so still on my street around this time on a Monday night. As if everyone has just stopped and the only noise you hear is the soothing sound of your air conditioner. You wonder if people can here you typing becuase that is how quiet it is. Is this the type of noise I want to here....Silence can be louder than the loudest bomb. My ears almost cracking waiting for someone to speak but nothing. I swear I can almost here someone in the next house turn over in bed and hear his dreams. Maniacs have been made with this silence. Maybe the noise that I hear from the silence is actually people talking people laughing people just being normal. I am in my room on my PC at almost 12 am on the verge of a tuesday morning. Or am I at work talking with a customer. Is the silence actually always there, do I even have a job, am I real.
For once I would like to have a vision in my head of what you all see. Clarity is something that people take for granted. You see a big beautiful rainbow and I just see wet grass. Pictures are in color or black and white who cares I am not in them. Seconds go by it seems like minutes that seem like hours that seem like days. How long have I been here at my dest writing to you. How long will the silence last before it breaks my head open and I am then only then seeing things clearer. Your rainbow my rainbow. My days are now seconds and I can't even begin to tell you where the silence has gone. Becuase now all I hear are voices.

Imagine if I heard voices?? LOL

Time For Bed.

Kelen: Interview with a Music Teacher about the Olympics

beijingyouthvoices — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 02:08:55 +0000

Du Xiajiao is a music teacher I met in Beichen Shopping Mall. She is a nice lady. Before I met her, there were several people did not want to receive our interviewing. When we met her and talked to her about our interviewing. She said she would like to do it. I was super-happy. You will see my happy face in my picture.

Kelen: What's your name?

Teacher: Du Xiajiao.

Kelen: What do you do for work?

Teacher: Music teacher.

Kelen: What is the great changes in Beijing Olympics?

Teacher: The environment of Beijing.

Kelen: You must be proud of our country hold the 29th Olympic Games?

Teacher: Of course. Beijing is my great hometown.

Kelen: Which sports will you follow most in the Beijing Olympics?

Teacher: Water sports are my favourite and I always go swimming with my friends.

Kelen: Which friendlies do you like best?

Teacher: Jing Jing(Panda) but all of them are lovely.

Kelen: Me too! I like panda best! Thank you. Goodbye~

Needs some work...

feyreasoning — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 21:08:25 +0000

[caption id="attachment_37" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="The end is nothing but another beginning"][/caption]

The following is the beginning to a story hastily scrawled out... Please, comment and tell me what you think of it. Does it have merit or should I abandon it? It's definately not my best work, but it's something...

An aching, pulsing pain, throbbing in tune with a stumbling heart. Blood tracing skin pale and smooth, a vivid river of shadows on a sunlit plain long deserted. The voices were screaming again in his head, their mad cackling scraping against the inside of his skull like a metal file, telling him all their blackest secrets and lies. His vision began to darken, lost in a sea of red.

Ven fell slowly to his knees. Around him, the last vestiges of a shattered night rushed to embrace the land a final time before fleeing the coming dawn. But even the night’s darkness at its prime failed to cover the wasteland before him.

Blood, still vibrantly crimson in the blackness, gently lapped against his legs, soaking through his tattered jeans to coat his skin in red gore. Just ahead of him, he could make out the sharp, clean lines of a body. It lay on its back, face broken and savaged, floating in a pool of its own fluids. A mass of brown hair streamed behind it, matted and tangled, the shredded remains of a life destroyed.

Rede.

Ven forced the name from his mind. No, that was not Rede, that pale, twisted thing before him. Rede was strong and healthy and so very brilliantly alive. Rede was… Ven began to vomit, the thick liquid creeping slowly through his fingers as he tried desperately to hold it back. It floated on top of the bloody water, brown and meaty, irrefutable evidence to the horrors of the night. He blinked frantically to clear the tears that burned in his eyes, turning his head quickly from side to side as common sense returned to him in a rush. It might still be out there, waiting.

Shakily, he stood, hiccupping. He avoided looking in the direction of Rede’s corpse, lest he be sick again, and told himself that the other dim shapes he saw were not the bodies of friends, but bits of swamp and dead tree. The acrid taste of bile scalded his tongue, telling him otherwise. He tried to ignore it.

But you can’t. It’s there. And so are Shelden, and Thed, and Maya. See that arm there…?

“Shut up,” he whispered. A wicked laugh, careening wildly from skull to throat to mouth, teased its way from between his lips. It tasted of sickness and obscenity, of hot and fetid flesh left to rot beneath a sun forever at its peak.

Can you smell it? It is still hot and alive, salty… It is sweet, so sweet… kneel and drink of life, taste…

Ven began to run…

Psychic Medium or ...?

morganlefey — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 13:03:55 +0000

Welcome to my blog.

I have decided to share my thoughts,feelings and experiences here because,quite frankly I need to let it all out.

Yes,I am posting anonymously as I come from a very small town and the spiritual journey I am about to take is fraught with many dangers,including ostracism,loss of business and the potential for humiliation if things don't work out.

I am not sure what's going on with me right now,about ten years ago I worked quite effectively as a psychic/tarot card reader and would,on occasion through no intentional means of my own communicate with the friends and relatives of my clients who had 'passed over'.

I enjoyed my work but soon life (and death) took over and I suffered some personal losses in my own family and shut myself down from the whole phenomena.

Now,at the age of 35,happily married with two children and a thriving alternative medicine business,I find myself over whelmed by the urge to start all over again,take a chance and open myself up to the world of spirit and see what comes through.

A metaphysical leap of faith,if you will.

This has been a really,really hard decision to make,and the outcome of the next six months or so will effectively shape the rest of my life.

I have prayed,fasted,meditated,sweated and literally obssessed over this decision for the past two or three years,and asked for God or Spirit or whoever it is to show me whether this was the right path for me,and if this is not what I am meant to do,then please remove this aching void from within me.

The feeling of urgency has only grown worse,the tendrils of this need to communicate messages of comfort to the grieving have slowly wound their way through every aspect of my life until I have reached the point where I am so mentally and spiritually exhausted from all the questioning of myself,and my motivations,and God's path for me that I have to get it out somewhere,and so I have to share.

I begin on Tuesday,I have been hired by a certain metaphysical shop to provide readings,both tarot/psychic and mediumistic,and my future is about to unfurl itself.

Before anyone sends me a post about development circles or training or protection,let me assure you that I am well prepared,I have done all my study,all my homework and feel psychically 'guarded'although I, myself choose not to come from a place of fear and superstition regarding such things as demons and possesion,not because I am ignorant enough to think they are not a reality on some lower plane somwhere,but simply because I feel God knows my intent,my desire and my heart,and like attracts like.

And I have provided readings of this nature before,and just recently I gave 'evidence'if that is the correct term to use to a young woman whose lover had passed away.The information seemed random and obtuse,abstract images, pictures,feelings and comments but she understood every word and could relate to all I said.

So, I guess I am questioning the validity of the process to a certain degree because the bereft will cling to any shred or hope in order to touch base with those they have lost,but the quality of information and the intensity of emotion that flowed through me was undeniable.

Was I simply reading her mind/aura/energy field?

I don't know.I don't know why this urge has come upon me so strongly it has almost swallowed me whole.

I don't know why God would place this desire in my heart if it isnt the path I am meant to take.

I can't even approach another psychic about it because it does feel like such a private and intimate quest.

This is the third blog I have attempted to write.The other two I simply reread and deleted because I felt my soul was on the page.

I do not regulary 'hear voices' and I don't 'see dead people' in my living room,but if I have the intent and am given the name of a person in spirit and if the conditions are right,then they come through.

When this occurs it is a beautiful and sacred experience for both myself and the person with me.

I do not intend to capitilise or charge for this,as I have decided that doing so feels wrong,but that is simply a personal choice I have made,and I am not criticising those who do charge for their services,I simply decided that money wasn't part of this for me.

Am I doing the right thing?Is this what God wants me to do?Is this simply my ego wanting to make me stand out,be 'different' and be seen as special?

My partner suggested i go 'see someone'about this,and I considered it.But if i went to a psychologist/psychiatrist and told them I have an overwhelming urge to talk to the dead,I am pretty sure I would be handed a plastic cup,spoon and my pyjamas and herded off to a safe place for observation.

I don't feel its a psychological issue,the rest of my life is functioning fine.

But the ache and the urge that I have felt nearly all my life,this sense of having to be somewhere,doing something at a certain time(Where,when,what?I have never really known)this sensation has returned and with it the urge to do 'this'.

I have no answers.Only questions.I guess time will tell.

Think of me and send me postive energy.

Til next time.

Love and Peace xx

Morgan

Voices

Louise — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 21:54:22 +0000

At first the voice was a benign, comforting presence but, as time passed, it became menacing and malevolent. Her own weapon had turned against her. A crazed dog who turns on its mistress when it is in pain. Gemma did not feel as though this voice was a part of her. It was an intruder embedded in her head. A parasite feeding off her thoughts and feelings. At first she welcomed it, embraced it, nurtured it. At first it had kept her alive. Now it was trying to kill her. A daemon behind the scenes, one that was visible only to her. A puppeteer pulling on her strings.