Reading "The State of Me" though, was a pleasure. It is moving but not over sentimental, and engrossing and very witty at the same time. At the start of the book, I thought that she had only skimmed the surface and that there was so much more to say, in order that people will understand what having this illness is really like. I thought she had not given very specific descriptions of symptoms, only the overall feelings.

As I read on, however, I discovered the way that she has managed to encapsulate the myriad experiences of this illness in a subtle and understated way. I can relate to several aspects of the story and of Helen's experiences, and while not going into every gory detail of the illness itself (and probably boring the readership) she very skilfully portrays the devastation the illness wreaks on a life. I was amazed that anyone could do this: to represent the monotony of feeling ill all the time, the feeling of being at a complete standstill, of life passing you by, of living at a different pace to everyone else and watching other people living more interesting lives... Jafry makes it into a page turner!

What an achievement. I read it far too quickly and then spent days recovering from the exertion, but I could not put it down: I just devoured it. It made me laugh and it didn't depress me at all. I felt uplifted at the end that someone with ME had managed to write such an amazing book and had managed to weave into it all aspects of living with ME: the lack of medical support, the pressure on personal and family relationships, losing your identity, the difficulty of explaining to people and being believed, the politics, the delicate balance of accepting the situation but holding onto hope that things will get better...

More than these things though, I enjoyed the way it was written. One example which has stayed with me is her description of "headaches like helmets". I remember in school being taught that the simile was the inferior version of a metaphor, only to be used when you were not clever enough to think of the latter, but Jafry has proved my teachers wrong! Jafry is brilliant at succinct description such as this; the alliteration only drumming in further how horrible, harsh and hard to cope with these heavy helmet headaches really are.

I did find the part about the diagnosis stage where Helen gets lots of medical tests (such as a muscle biopsy) which find various abnormalities quite unlike my own experience or that of anyone I know (we get standard blood tests which come back as "in the normal range" and that is that). It does serve a purpose in the book though, to demonstrate to readers that know nothing about the condition that there are tests that can be done that do show abnormalities and it reinforces that it is a physical illness.

Jafry has a recurring conversation with a stranger through the book, which I think was inspired. It gives a potential outsider's perspective and also provides the chance to enlighten the stranger (and the reader) in a way that we do not usually get the chance to do. These responses to the stranger's questions/comments are well thought out and are often more like what you wished you had said, when reflecting back on a conversation later! Things that strangers have said to me have felt very significant and have stayed with me for a long time afterwards... it always amazes me the ridiculous things people say, but also how we can be affected by them.

I was pleased that by the end of the book Helen had not made a total recovery as this would have been so unlike the reality of so many people's experiences. Her health could still go either way, as could her relationship; both are looking more promising but nothing is perfect! Although it is fairly traditional "happy ending" in many ways, it is so unexpected from events earlier in the book, that you are genuinely so pleased things seem to be working out. I really bonded with the characters, warts and all, and think that they were very skilfully and believably written.

I could give so many examples of funny and well written parts of this novel, but I have not quoted from it much as I want people to read her words fresh for the first time and in context. I kept my discussion of the ending as unspecific as I could whilst giving the compliments that I felt were only right. All I can say is go and read it! Which I may go and do again very soon, and with my limited energy I don't often read anything twice, so that has to be the biggest compliment I could give... Nasim Marie Jafry, well done!

I don't know what McCain would do to pay for it, but I liked his idea of buying up old folks mortgages and then refinancing them at rates the people can afford to pay in order to keep old folks in their homes.  If McCain would only come up with more ideas like that one -- and show us how he's going to pay for them -- he could run on the issues, rather than run a Karl Rovian smear campaign.  Maybe he'd still loose.  But maybe he'd win.  And at least he'd be doing his civic duty to give the American people a real choice in November.

The only other thing I greatly liked about McCain's performance last night was he didn't indulge himself -- as he and Sarah Palin have while campaigning these last few days -- in flinging feces at Obama as if he (McCain) were some kind of chimpanzee rather than a presidential candidate.  McCain was on the offensive, but he didn't stoop to flinging crap about Ayers or Wright, etc.  Consequently, he didn't look nearly as desperate, needy and panicked as he has to me on the campaign trail these past few days.

The thing that makes me most proud of this election is the American people.  By and large, we Americans seem to understand the importance of this election and we are locked on and tracking it in large numbers.

Obama impressed me as authentic, knowledgable, even-tempered, and in touch with the people last night.  In deciding who to vote for, I go with what I know and my gut response to it.  That is, I gather as much information as I can, analyse it, and then figure out what my gut has decided.  I do that over and over until the day comes when I actually vote.  Right now, my gut is for Obama.  That might change between now and my vote, but I don't know of any other way to do it that leaves me as happy with my final decision.  In the past, when I've made purely intellectual decisions, I've lived to regret them.  Likewise, when I've made purely gut decisions, I've lived to regret some of them too.  But this mix of head and gut seems to work for me.

As usual, the CBS/Knowledge Networks poll (.pdf) came out shortly after the debate.  According to the poll, 40 percent of uncommitted voters watching the debate believed Obama won.  That's compared to 26 percent who thought McCain won, and another 34 percent who thought it was a tie.  The margin of error was 4 percentage points, so there is no statistically significant difference between the size of the group that thought Obama won and the size of the group that thought the debate was a tie.  However, there is a statistically significant difference between those two groups and the size of the smaller group that thought McCain won.

When asked who would make the right decisions about the economy, Obama made statistically significant gains among the uncommitted voters during the debate, but McCain didn't.  For all practical purposes, the same percentage of people thought McCain would make the right economic decisions before the debate as after it.

When the voters were asked who would make the right decisions about the war in Iraq, neither Obama nor McCain picked up statistically significant support during the debate.  That means the debate did little to help Obama close the gap between himself and McCain on that question.

Yet, when the uncommitted voters were asked who understood their needs and problems, Obama's support lept 21 percentage points, while McCain's went up a mere 11 percentage points.  Obama was already ahead on that question, but he widened his lead last night.

Overall, the debate moved as many people into one camp as it did into the other.  Fifteen percent committed to Obama, 12 percent committed to McCain (a statistically insignificant difference), and 72 percent remained uncommitted.

Some of us complain about these polls, but I find the scientific ones infinitely more valuable than the frequently biased guesses of our nation's pundits.  If you were laying money on it, it would be foolish to bet that a spin-puppy knows more about what people are thinking than a good poll reveals.

Well, those are my thoughts this morning on the debate.  Now I'm curious how you saw it?

The fire caused $3 million in damage to the structure and contents of the house but the home was not destroyed, Inspector James Barnes of the fire department said. The flames were confined to the living room.

"Nick Nolte was there apparently with a water hose trying to extinguish the fire himself and of course we came to help him out," Barnes said.

Nolte's spokesman, Arnold Robinson, said in a statement the actor was "grateful" to firefighters and police "for their quick response and assistance."

Nolte, 67, is a two-time Oscar nominee for his roles in "The Prince of Tides" and "Affliction." He stars in the Ben Stiller comedy "Tropic Thunder" and will next appear in the thriller "Nine Miles Down" from British director Anthony Waller. famous scientist biography, list of famous duos, famous hermaphrodites, famous short speeches

Don't get me wrong, NS has been said to be two of the most tiring years any Singaporean guy will face but then again, it depends on the guy. Lets try to put it in a situation you can understand. Say you are going to do something you hate but you have no choice because it is mandatory. You would probably feel very negative. I would at first, but then I'll think about it and day dream about the possibilities and I'll say to myself "I haven't done it yet, so I can't judge how bad it is going to be".

Treat everything like an adventure. Wake up to a new day knowing there is an adventure coming, even if it is just work or school. Jump out ( or crawl out) of bed and get ready for a day where anything can happen. You can get a promotion or an A for a test. You might lose a friend or gain new ones. I can't tell you. I didn't write the book of destiny! LOL! If I did, I would turn the whole world upside down.

Anyways, that is the advice for your whole life. Treat everyday like an unexpected adventure.

my friend nella. 

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How I wish I could surrender my soul;
Shed the clothes that become my skin;
See the liar that burns within my needing.
How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold.
How I wish I had screamed out loud,
Instead I've found no meaning.

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind;
Hold memory close at hand,
Help me understand the years.
How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell.
How I wish I would save my soul.
I'm so cold from fear.

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
Far, far away; find comfort in pain.
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

When the economy level to the bottom of tanks, crime rises.  The old joke is that people commit crimes in good times and bad, but the fact is that when people can't earn a living lawfully, people who would not be otherwise inclined to commit crimes become desperate and make desperate choices.  Not all, and it's not an acceptable reason, but it happens. Even a good mathematicians can agree when economic times are down, crime is up.

Crime is just one of many, many "social pathologies" that are over-represented among the poor: alcoholism, drug abuse, smoking, obesity, illegitimacy, etc. None of these are good escape routes from poverty. So instead of trying to explain why "poverty causes crime" or "poverty causes obesity," it makes sense to look for common causes of poverty and social pathologies.

People who have biased beliefs about practical matters, and/or exercise poor impulse control, are likely to screw up their lives across the board. So it's hardly surprising that poverty and self-destructive behavior go hand in hand. Rather than being a natural response to poverty, a lot of crime can be seen as objectively self-destructive behavior that happens to have an unusually large amount of collateral damage.

People who become a suspect in crimes or committed a crime they go directly to jail if they are poor and can't afford legal defense representation.They face a big question where will the money come from to pay for the lawyer. Yes, they can be represented by a public defender.These are the best know, best-regarded criminal defense lawyers.  These are not always the best lawyers,  but the ones to whom people who couldn't judge a lawyer if their life depended on it (and it does) flock. Public defenders will still get their paycheck, but their caseloads will double or triple, and their supervisors will shrug because there is nothing to be done.  Plea offers will get worse, because the prosecutors will realize that poor don't have the manpower to carry the load, and pressure will come to bear to clear out cases as quickly as possible.

If you commit crimes, you wish you're like Claudio Teehankee Jr.You can be granted executive clemency.You see Amigo! you are rotten in jail because you are poor. Teehankee was freed after 14 years. How many prisoners remain in jail for more than 14 years because they are poor and could not afford a lawyer who would work for their release? With the country's glaringly corrupt judicial system it is very hard to believe that the above legal treatment of the rich is purely in there interests.

What makes it more absurd is that  some judges have used the picture of Ninoy in a bundle of peso in their verdict. Who cares? if it fails to comply with the court's ruling. It is clear that the judges had no respect for their own country and people. The currency issue merely indicates the poor awareness of the judges in enforcing the law. The verdict also shows how law enforcers, once again, have ignored the principle of lex specialis derogat lex generalis (the application of a specific, rather than a general, law) The judges can no doubt cite any number of legal justifications in defence of their decision, We do not wish to say that the rich is free from mistakes, nor is it our intention to claim that the rich is untouchable and can use its freedom as it wants, without restriction.---Who's next? Rolito GO.

We began, as all good explorations should, with a picnic dinner. Having filled ourselves with bread. cheese. crisps and fruit (NOT eggs...) we marched off into the woods. We quickly marched back out again when the kids heard the approaching sound of hunting dogs - la chasse was in full swing, so perhaps walking through that part of the forest was not such a good idea!

So we diverted round the edge of the woods and wound our way down to la Pont du Deluge. This is our favourite spot due to the lovely stream flowing through the trees that the kids like to try crossing on precarious stepping-stones. There was no chance of them getting wet on this occasion however, asd the stream was virtually dry! What a disappointment.

Undaunted by the lack of flowing water, we set our sights on harvesting the chestnuts that were littering the ground. Always the hunter-gatherers, Kevin and Sylvie were very excited at the thought of taking them home and adding them to the evening's meal. So we all started trawling the area for the green spiky balls (...behave!) that sheltered the chestnuts.

After pricking ny fingers several times, and being the geek that I am, I fashioned a "gadget" out of a twig for picking them up, for which I was basically laughed at. Meh,,,some people just don't recognise genius when they see it :)

In the end we collected quite a haul and, supplemented by a few edible mushrooms, we had our starter for the night:

Or so I thought.......

In fact, THIS was my starter for the night:

Clockwise, from the top, we have spleen, tripe and veal head. Not pictured is the pigs trotter.

Yes folks, Sylvie had lined me up with a traditional French bush-tucker trial as a challenge especially for me! How kind......

So, with the pride of a nation at stake I did my bit for blighty, closed my eyes and sampled some slices of these French treats. I have to say, they weren't as disgusting as I thought they would be. The spleen took me back to school dinners eating cold liver. And the tripe and veal head were vaguely like the inside of a cheap pork-pie. Pigs trotter was just a fatty pork chop with very little meat. I managed to eat a little of everything and thereby took another step along the path of integration into proper French society :)

Luckily. the rest of the evening passed without further challenges and I could sit back and enjoy the lovely birthday meal that Lisa had prepared. The company, once again, was excellent. All the kids played like they were life-long friends and the adults could just relax and chat...and try not to fall asleep  *cough*Sylvie*cough* ;)

Another excellent night. With everyone sleeping over it was a very relaxed affair, followed by a very lazy morning. The perfect end to my birthday celebrations and the first of many more such occasions I suspect.

And yet, I have to admit that Christian Bale is now my second biggest movie star crush. Christian has looks, and he's certainly got talent, but I've now heard Kal Penn speaking for himself, seen him in action in the real world, and I've even had the chance to see him in person. (See my crummy cell phone snapshot, left. I couldn't find my camera that day. My apologies.) I loved the Harold and Kumar movies, and House, M.D. He's certainly cute, and the boy can act, but I didn't truly fall for Kal Penn until I saw him out in the real world, gushing in his own words about the integrity and brilliance of Barack Obama. He's clearly an idealist, (Kal, I mean. Well, Barack, too.) but he states his case with intelligence and conviction that makes his enthusiasm contageous. He's cute, he's smart, he's passionate... How could a girl resist?

My crush began when I saw this interview on The Late Show with Craig Ferguson on September 5:

Yes, Kal, you can take me into a little room and do things, too... Ahem. Where was I? Ah, yes. Smart, enthusiastic, idealistic. What a guy! What I found most touching is that this bona-fide movie star, prime-time TV regular, and cult hero (for Harold and Kumar) said that he was volunteering to wear an orange vest and usher people around because he felt that this "could really make a difference." In an industry and at a level of success that encourages self-centeredness and self-congratulation, Kal Penn has spent most of 2008 working like crazy for a cause that he truly believes (or so he's convinced me) will make the world a better place for everyone.

Last Saturday, I got to see Kal Penn in person, along with Eva Longoria (of Desperate Housewives) and Adam Rodriguez (of CSI Miami), speaking at my old stomping grounds on Auraria Campus in downtown Denver. (Auraria Campus is home to three schools: Community College of Denver, Metropolitan State College of Denver, and my alma mater, the University of Colorado at Denver.) He gave a speech similar to the one in the video below, which is from Cleveland, on his pre-primary campus tour. Of course, since I saw him two days before the deadline for Coloradoans to register to vote, he was pushing us specifically for that, but most of the examples and analogies were the same. (The specifics of Obama's plan for college financial aid weren't in Saturday's speech, either. I wonder if Obama's plan has changed. I'll have to go check on that.)

I was quite impressed with Kal's intellect, passion, and speaking skill. (For context, I'm a Toastmaster and a former high-school debater, and I gave the sermon at my church when I was 16 years old. It takes a bit to impress me.)

And finally, check out this interview with Kal on the primary campaign trail in January:

Yum! Look at that hope, that beautiful enthusiasm! As one of the YouTube commenters said, "And it doesn't hurt that he's cute." Not at all, though actually, I can't remember how cute I thought he was on the big screen, when I knew nothing of him as a person. But now that I can see his excitement, his speaking skill, and that big, big brain, well... I'm sorry, Christian. We'll always have high school, and college, and all of my twenties, but there's a new guy making my heart go pit-a-pat. Sigh...

And Kal, in the unlikely event that you'd see this: Yes, I've registered to vote. Yes, I've told others to register, too. Yes, I, a registered Independent like you, am volunteering for Barack, too. Thanks for everything you're doing. All joking aside, you have my respect, and my heartfelt thanks.

Portanto, começo a prestar atenção à musica, e quando dou por mim já dançava desenfreadamente na praia. Kizomba é um dos tipos de música que não me deixa ficar quieta na cadeira. Espero que em alguns de vocês provoque o mesmo efeito. E por estes dias chuvosos de Outono, pareceu-me uma bela forma de recordar que in-world, o clima só depende da nossa vontade.

Esta noite, entre as 22:00 e as 24:00, o spy oferece-nos música de África. Para mim que nasci por lá, a coisa tem um significado acrescido. Para os que por lá viram a luz do sol pela primeira vez tenho a certeza que a ligação é especial também. Para quem apenas aprecia, gosta ou ama de paixão... bora dançar ? :D

SARAH PALIN'S DAUGHTER IS PREGNANT!!!!!!! What in the world? And Palin wants to win this election with McCain. You might as well throw those dreams away of living in the White House away. Now, every teenager can tell their parents they are pregnant and use the excuse "Sarah Palin's daughter was pregnant when she was 17 too!"

The article I am reading keeps talking about Palin's and her husband's support and unconditional love for their daughter. Bull****! She has to say that! She would be throwing away the White house if she doesn't. She would be really pissed her daughter and everything and tell her to get an abortion or put up for adoption. Now she is going to marry the kid's father and live happily ever after? Man this sounds like Jamie Lynn Spears' story all over again. That was almost a year ago.

Palin has to do a lot of things and her duaghter isn't helping. That is understood. I am wondering why she did it. Lack of attention from her mum or both her parents. Palin's daughter must have had a reason. Palin might be in it for the White house and the power, which makes her seem inhuman, but her daughter should have some reason.

I wonder what it is.

Sources:

http://www.nypost.com/seven/09012008/news/nationalnews/palin_admits_her_17_year_old_daughter_is_127025.htm